Make Friends With No


Hi Reader,

What If Every “No” Was a Good Thing?

Stick with me. You pitched your story. You queried the agent. You posted the excerpt.
And what you got back was… silence. Or worse, a “pass.”

Cue the imposter syndrome orchestra. (Hello darkness, my old friend.)

But wait! Before you spiral into a Netflix-and-regret marathon, let me offer you a spicy little reframe:

A “no” isn’t the end of the road. It’s a neon arrow saying: “Not here, not yet—but keep going.”

A No Means Someone Read It

First off—let’s give “no” some credit. Someone took the time to look at your work – even if they just read your cocktail pitch. That’s not nothing! In a world of inbox avalanches and ten-second attention spans, your idea made it into someone’s brain.

Even if they said “not for me,” it still means your story is out there, mingling with the world like a party guest looking for the right dance partner.

Each No Is a Compass

Here’s a radical idea: No is not rejection—it’s redirection.

Every pass is helping your story steer toward its real audience. The one that gets it. The people who laugh at your jokes, cry at your climaxes, and maybe even knit fan art of your characters. Think of “no” like a GPS reroute. Not a dead end—just a different turn.

Your Story Just Hasn’t Found Its People Yet

You’re not writing for everyone. (You shouldn’t be!) You’re writing for the reader who sees your weird little world and goes, “OH MY GOD, YES.”

J.K. Rowling was rejected by 12 publishers. Stephen King tossed Carrie in the trash until his wife fished it out. Agatha Christie got rejection letters for five years. These writers didn’t change their stories to please the no’s—they held on until they found the yes.

Rejection didn’t mean their stories weren’t good. It meant their stories hadn’t landed in the right hands yet.

Reframe Rejection as Progress

Let’s play a game. Every “no” you get? Put a tally on a sticky note. Make it a badge of honor.

That’s not failure. That’s data.

You’re learning:

  • What kinds of responses your work gets.
  • Who isn’t your audience.
  • How to keep pitching with clarity and conviction.

Eventually, a no becomes:
❌ Not for this agent
❌ Not for this reader
❌ Not for this publisher

And finally—
✅ YES for your ideal audience who has been waiting for a story like yours.

Grow Your Nos

Here’s the mindset shift:
A no doesn’t shrink you. It grows you.

It makes you resilient. Focused. Clearer about what you want to say, and who you’re saying it to.

Each no is a seed. Keep planting. The yes is coming.

And when it does? It won’t just be any yes. It’ll be a “heck yes,” a “where-have-you-been-all-my-life” yes, a “let’s make beautiful creative babies together” yes.

📖 For Authors: You Don’t Want Every Reader—You Want Your Reader

Let’s say someone picks up your book, reads a chapter, and puts it down with a shrug. That feels like failure… but it’s actually filtering. You don’t want your book to be “fine” or “meh” or “technically competent.” You want it to make someone stay up past their bedtime, reading “just one more chapter”.

When someone doesn’t connect? That’s the universe saying: “Not your reader.” Good! Let them go. You’re not trying to win everyone. You’re trying to ignite delight in the hearts of the readers who will love your characters like family and recommend your book with the zeal of a caffeinated missionary.

Fandoms aren’t built on mild approval. They’re built on obsession. Which means your book needs to be bold enough to turn some people off. It’s the only way to truly turn others on.

🎬 For Screenwriters: You’re Not Writing a Demo Reel—You’re Building a Voice

If someone passes on your screenplay because it’s “too quirky” or “too niche” or “a little out there”… congratulations! You’re developing a voice. The worst feedback a screenwriter can get is “meh, this could’ve been written by anyone.”

Executives may say no now—but when the right champion sees your script and says, “This is exactly what we need,” you’ll be glad you didn’t tone it down to please the passers-by. Every no from someone who “doesn’t get it” is narrowing the funnel toward someone who will.

And in Hollywood, a strong voice—even one that gets a lot of rejections—is currency. A meh writer might get staffed for a season. A writer with a distinct voice builds a career.

You’re Building a Tribe

It’s not about going viral. It’s about being unmistakable to the people who matter. The ones who read your work and feel like you reached inside their brain and took notes. The ones who turn into your newsletter subscribers, superfans, and “OMG I WILL READ ANYTHING YOU WRITE” readers.

When someone doesn’t buy your book? That’s not a failure. That’s helping you find your raving fans faster. Your people are out there. They’re just waiting for your story.

Keep going. Keep sharing. Keep writing.


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If you read on a Kindle, when you finish the book an option to rate the book one out of five stars pops up. Help the author out! If you liked the book, rate it five stars. You don't even have to write a review. The five stars help the author’s review ranking. And positive reviews sell books!


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Cheers,

Lindsey

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Hi I'm Lindsey Hughes

Hi, I’m Lindsey. I love helping people discover their superpower, create compelling content, and feel excited about pitching and networking. I teach people how to pitch like a boss, network like a VIP, and write like an Oscar winner. Subscribe to my weekly newsletter for actionable creativity and career tips.

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